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Too little, too Late, Late
Breakfast Show The truth
about the death of Michael Lush, an audience-member
who died in a ‘Whirly Wheel’ stunt
on the BBC’s Late, Late Breakfast Show in
1986, will be revealed in a shocking TV docu-drama
– years after the event.
Commissioned for Channel 5 by
erstwhile be-whiskered TV know-all Noel Edmonds,
the 90-minute programme will star Noel as himself,
while light-haired side-kicker Mike Smith's heavy
shoes will be filled by none other than Dustin
Gee’s widower Les Dennis.
Now ostracised by the BBC and
living it large-sized with on-screen wife Mr Blobby
in rural Devon, Edmonds is hoping this dramatisation
will put the record straight a bit, by telling
it like it was, not how it was, and rather than
like it is, which is how it wasn’t but will
now appear to be in the film.
Said Edmunds: “Hopefully
the programme will clear the air, into which the
man fell, and also my name, that being Noel Edmonds.”
Viewers can expect the dramatisation
to reveal how Mr Lush came to be hiding in a box
stuck to a fifty foot high ceiling, why he proceeded
to jump out of it without being attached to the
bungee rope, and how he ended up hitting the floor
really hard with his body and dying right there
and then.
Top, middle or bloody
bottoms?
The show will mark the beginning
of Channel 5’s celebrity murderers season,
which will include
- the real story behind Stuart
Lubbock’s drowning at the bony-fingered
hands of Barry Michaelmore
- lots of footage of that cameraman
getting stabbed in the leg on Shane Ritchie’s
brainchild Swag!
- plus an interview with Dirty
Den about the time he put a German taxi driver
to death just for fun.
A big budget Hollywood
film is also in the pipeline about Eric Clapton’s
tragic failure to stop his son falling out of
the window, on account of his slow hand.
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